Drawn & Quintered #37

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Today’s five-word suggestion comes to us from MDude.

Wait, I thought Professor Hazard was a professor so he wouldn't have to deal with battlin' chumps!

Time for a Pokemon Battle!

The other three Pokémon are, of course, Beedrill, Jolteon, and Electivire. As for Eric’s team, who knows.

Drawn & Quintered #36

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Today’s five-word suggestion comes to us from Replay.

squink squonk squink squonk squink squonk splish sploosh

“I can hear you giggling…”

Keep walkin’, Max. You know you look good.

Drawn & Quintered #35

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Today’s five-word suggestion comes to us from Fizz Man.

Don't go to the Forbidden City without your cryptozoologist's meat hammer (Hammacher Schlemmer, $49.99)

Where can I get blood?

Fizz Man asked me what cryptozoologists normally wear, and this is what I told him. And he believed me! What a dope!

Drawn & Quintered #34

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Today’s five-word suggestion comes to us from MDude.

And verily they did not all fit; the Amphibigon behind Stinkaboo is half-assed, and poor Buffeltweet must still be in the laundry basket.

We might not all fit.

This ought to keep our detail-oriented fans busy for a good few minutes.

Drawn & Quintered #33

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Today’s five-word suggestion comes to us from Dr. Billy.

No! My philtrum! I need it, for stuff!

Look, I got your nose!

A short list of things I find sexy about a woman*:
– the forehead
– hair (preferably blonde or another color)
– eyes
– eyelashes
– the cheeks
– the philtrum (obviously)
– lips
– the neck
– the clavicle (OHH THE CLAVICLE)
– b r e a s t s
– a fabric fold implying the shape of a nipple (different from visibly erect nipples)
– visibly erect nipples
– the inner arm
– fists
– bulky denim gloves
– metallic accents

*or an effeminate man, when I’m not wearing glasses

Drawn & Quintered #32

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Today’s five-word suggestion comes to us from MDude.

The Japanese child is only a little worried that Electron Ramsey is going to steal his belly-button.

Get out of there, boy!

Our hearts break here at SHM for Japan and its people. If you can spare it, please text REDCROSS to 90999 to donate $10, or go to redcross.org to see what else you can do to help.

Drawn & Quintered #31

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Today’s five-word suggestion comes to us from MDude.

Prof's Rule of Quintering: When you're not feelin' it, draw tits.

Never trust a shape-shifter.

Technically four words, since he hyphenated it, but whatever. As long as I can get revenge on the world for my high blood sugar by giving someone an uncomfortable work boner, I’m happy. NEUF

Drawn & Quintered #30

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Today’s five-word suggestion comes to us from Lark.

I don't even like champagne...!

Replay gives the toast. Cheers!

My friend Replay is kind of a dick.

Drawn & Quintered #29

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Today’s five-word suggestion comes to us from Fizz Man.

If we give the alien a cold...

those two are different prafs

We’ll have to kill them both, to be sure.

Drawn & Quintered #28

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Today’s five-word suggestion comes to us from Jackanapes.

I know what you're thinking - how did they even make it as far as the carnival?

Mustachio laughs at your predicament!

MUSTACHIO! HAHAHA…!!